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How to fail forward

December 10, 2015 by Anne Filed Under: Anne's Blog, Uncategorized Leave a Comment

fail forward

*Remember that time you flunked out of the University of Iowa and went on to get your Masters from the University of Florida?
*Remember when you had that terrible breakup and picked up and moved to Houston?
*Remember when you wanted to move to Chicago and turned your 2 year plan into a 1 year plan?
*Remember when you lost your job so you became a nanny and started a business?
*Remember when you were in an unhappy marriage so you decided to leave, deciding you deserved more for your life?
*Remember when you went from 2 incomes to 1 and managed to make shit work anyway?

Somehow with all those successes in my life, I still find myself thinking, “What if I fail?” What most people don’t know is when I moved out in August, I struggled. I didn’t struggle with the divorce or whether it was the right choice. I struggled with who I am at my core. Who am I when I have the freedom to be myself? I didn’t know how to show up day in and day out, so I didn’t show up at all. Yes, I posted on Facebook. Yes, I worked out and took care of myself. Yes, I read personal development and worked on my emotional health. When I sat down to actually work my business, I froze.

The outcome? My income plummeted. My teammates know I refer to this as my “downward spiral”. Turns out, when you’re your own boss and you don’t show up to do your work…you don’t get paid. A month later, I got my shit together and not only helped get my own business back on track but started closely mentoring others to share what I was doing. In the last couple months, I’ve hosted team calls, mentored teammates, seen greater success than I’ve seen in awhile, and was on an all-time high last month. I had coaches telling their teams to look to ME for guidance because they felt I could train them better.

So last night, I got called out by Michelle (because as coaches, we hold each other accountable for EVERYTHING).

“Are you ok? You sound like something’s up.”

“Yeah, I’m just struggling with fear. What if I fail? What if I’ve mentored and trained all these people and it doesn’t work? What if I’ve led an entire team of coaches down the wrong path? What if what I’ve done consistently no longer works? What if this month my income plummets again?”

“Anne. You don’t have fear of failure. You have fear of success.”

Our minds are very powerful things. They believe whatever we tell them to believe. It doesn’t matter how many times you succeed, if you continue to tell yourself the NEXT time you’ll surely fail….then that’s what you’ll do. Talk about self-sabotage at its finest.

So how do you get out of that cycle?

*write your goals down
*write affirmations and post that shit everywhere
*every time a negative thought enters your mind, replace it with a positive thought
*ACTION. Action conquers fear every time
*surround yourself with a support system

What fears are you currently struggling with? Do you have a support system to help you come up with a plan of action to push through those fears? I am thankful every day to be surrounded by thousands of empowered, successful women who help me see my value and talents. Then they tell me to get my shit together and get to work because the only way to get to success is through failure.

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*Disclaimer*
Radical Rebirth was written and published while I was still deep in the New Age world. Although my story is accurate, the beliefs I express in the book are no longer accurate. I will be writing a second edition to tell my story through my new lens.

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