I was chatting with a friend the other day about looking for validation on social media through likes/comments.
Business owners – you know exactly what I’m talking about.
You go to post something and throughout the day (if not immediately, if it’s a really potent post), you start to stalk your notifications to see who liked it, commented, etc.
What does that mean? You’re looking for validation. Acceptance. Love.
Basically, social media is simply an avenue in order for you to offer value (energy) to your followers. What happens, though, is we often get stuck in that cycle of immediately looking for the validation.
When we create, we give energy outward. When we deplete ourselves (even the tiniest amount), we have a habit based on what we’ve been taught to look outside of ourselves to replenish that energy/love.
Here’s where it gets really mind-blowing for those of you who have never been taught how energy works. When you look for validation/love from your followers, you are literally blocking them from being able to hire/pay you. Why? Because there’s an imbalance of energy.
If you are looking to them for energy/love/value, what is their reason for paying you? You’ve completely eliminated that energetic need to invest.
I get how hard that habit is to break, because it’s a pattern I still have to work through. It’s a deep addiction to rely on others for love.
This is probably what your current cycle looks like:
Create > feel depleted > look for validation > feel shitty/not good enough > feel lack > feel the need to take more action > take more action trying to “get” > eventually burn the fuck out
Here’s a healthier way to manage that:
Create > replenish your own energy/do something that feels loving > take inspired action once it feels exciting again > replenish again > rinse and repeat
Sounds simple. Also easy as fuck to avoid, slipping into old patterns.
Try the new pattern/cycle for a week and let me know what shifts you notice in your life!